tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post5626816526962264435..comments2024-03-18T18:25:19.316-07:00Comments on Ladybug's Lair: Dad's DisciplineLadybughttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17150609820066935078noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-12976061775506936612012-06-16T20:06:55.900-07:002012-06-16T20:06:55.900-07:00Ladybug, this is a wonderful tribute to your fathe...Ladybug, this is a wonderful tribute to your father -- and his father. Yes, I know well how hard it is to break the cycle. I chose not to use spankings on my children... I could not sort out my feelings of having been beaten on. I also didn't have the look... sometimes it took a great deal of creativity to give my two sons (or let them find) natural consequences for their wrong actions. <br /><br />Thank you for sharing this story of your father and a success story of someone who broke a family pattern (who knows from how many generations back).<br /><br />SalomaSaloma Miller Furlonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11269289644573402840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-27997748201505190092012-06-16T19:05:42.896-07:002012-06-16T19:05:42.896-07:00Anonymous - granted, not everyone is as lucky. I c...Anonymous - granted, not everyone is as lucky. I can well understand your stance if your past experience with your father was not good. I certainly do know just how fortunate I was to have a father who treated me as he did. I might very well feel as you do if my grandfather had chosen to continue the cycle of abuse, for abuse leaves nothing but destruction in its wake...<br /> <br />I do believe that we all see the world through our own filters depending on our personality, life experiences, and attitude. This blog, as most are, is strictly from my point of view - how I see the world. We all see differently, and those who visit here frequently know that I do often include a Bible verse that I find relevant. It is not my intent to "preach" to anyone. - you can take it or leave it. <br /><br />Thanks for stopping by - I do value your comments.Ladybughttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17150609820066935078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-13684595376590700242012-06-16T08:16:34.708-07:002012-06-16T08:16:34.708-07:00Enjoyed the part about your father - but not all p...Enjoyed the part about your father - but not all people are lucky enough to have that kind of father and therefore our image of the "heavenly" father is skewed - and we deeply resent anyone preaching to us that the "heavenly" father is an example of our father - oh wait - yes he is - he tortures us (god will not give you more than you can bear) - what kind of good father would push their child to the breaking point just to see what they would do - what a load of - well, you know - CRAP!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-18363301455672785942012-06-15T22:29:40.579-07:002012-06-15T22:29:40.579-07:00Laura - I'm so sorry for the abuse you suffere...Laura - I'm so sorry for the abuse you suffered as a child. Certainly no one deserves that, especially a child. But always remember that YOU chose another route, that being NOT to continue that cycle with your own kids. That takes a strength of character, as Performance PI said, and I commend you for that.Bet your boys always felt loved!<br /><br />Performance PI - I never knew that grandfather, as he died before I was born. Your grampa did share the story of the beatings, however, and I'm sure that was true. How that great-grandfather of yours managed to keep his cool with all those wild boys out on the Montana prairie is beyond me!<br /><br />That picture of Grampa in the long grass was taken at the lake (Terry & Jesse were in it, too, but I cropped it just down to Grampa.) Jesse was in a child carrier, so I think this must have been taken around 1981?Ladybughttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17150609820066935078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-79124251550234305362012-06-15T17:37:47.228-07:002012-06-15T17:37:47.228-07:00Thanks for sharing these memories and the memories...Thanks for sharing these memories and the memories of a great-grandfather I never met. I had no recollection of the bible verse but it really fits the story. <br /><br />Kudos to everyone who, having experienced abuse, put it aside as something they did not want to pass on. It takes great strength not to mimic authority figures (which parents are) in times of stress and to still find the line that does provide guidance for self-discipline (the internalized discipline that we all want our youth to find). <br /><br />Great story, Barb.Performance PIhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17190221306703944113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-91063463147787924612012-06-15T17:33:37.207-07:002012-06-15T17:33:37.207-07:00You're right that stopping the cycle of abuse ...You're right that stopping the cycle of abuse is such an important thing and it has come from within someone who was abused and, as such, feels no need to pass that feeling on... someone who feels better themselves for finding an alternative. <br /><br />Thanks, then, to the great grandfather I never knew and to the grandfather, I did know who passed on the techniques for self-discipline (internalized discipline) based on knowledge of what's right and knowledge that we are loved. <br /><br />The bible quote is one I hadn't ever seen. It fits this so well, though. <br /><br />And, I love the picture of Grandpa out on the prairie with walking stick. It's one I had never seen before. <br /><br />Thanks for sharing these memories.Performance PIhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17190221306703944113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-41773203825749155922012-06-15T09:24:15.476-07:002012-06-15T09:24:15.476-07:00nice memories you have of your father ladybug...an...nice memories you have of your father ladybug...and i enjoyed seeing your pictures too.<br /><br />my childhood memories are too much to share here...filled with mental & physical abuse...no warm hugs or security. but i think because of that...i was just the opposite with my 2 sons. i wanted to hug them and never let go...laurak/ForestWalkArt :)https://www.blogger.com/profile/00285156023840252154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-22006864672540780832012-06-14T20:46:23.969-07:002012-06-14T20:46:23.969-07:00Becky - kudos to your brother! Some kids who are a...Becky - kudos to your brother! Some kids who are abused do anything to avoid doing the same to their kids, like my grandfather did. Unfortunately, many just turn around and do the same thing to their kids as was done to them, thus the "cycle" of abuse. Sorry to hear of your experience with that. Thanks so much for your kind words and for stopping by. Also, for sharing - I value your comments.Ladybughttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17150609820066935078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3917642184695061989.post-78917391424978342682012-06-14T17:17:11.740-07:002012-06-14T17:17:11.740-07:00That was so nice. My father was nothing like that....That was so nice. My father was nothing like that. He was completely strict and abusive at times. My brother however never hits his daughter...he has the look, lol.becky3086https://www.blogger.com/profile/01026872543168452124noreply@blogger.com